TOPIC: Successful Parenting [RCCG Sunday School STUDENT Manual 20 January 2019]

MEMORY VERSE: “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” – Ephesians 6:4 (scroll down for RCCG SUNDAY SCHOOL 20 January 2019 HYMN)

BIBLE PASSAGE: 1 Samuel 2:12-17, 29-30 KJV (RCCG Sunday School STUDENT Manual 20 January 2019)

1 Samuel 2:12-17:
12 Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they knew not the LORD.

13 And the priests’ custom with the people was, that, when any man offered sacrifice, the priest’s servant came, while the flesh was in seething, with a fleshhook of three teeth in his hand;

14 And he struck it into the pan, or kettle, or caldron, or pot; all that the fleshhook brought up the priest took for himself. So they did in Shiloh unto all the Israelites that came thither.

15 Also before they burnt the fat, the priest’s servant came, and said to the man that sacrificed, Give flesh to roast for the priest; for he will not have sodden flesh of thee, but raw.

16 And if any man said unto him, Let them not fail to burn the fat presently, and then take as much as thy soul desireth; then he would answer him, Nay; but thou shalt give it me now: and if not, I will take it by force.

17 Wherefore the sin of the young men was very great before the LORD: for men abhorred the offering of the LORD.

1 Samuel 2:29-30:
29 Wherefore kick ye at my sacrifice and at mine offering, which I have commanded in my habitation; and honourest thy sons above me, to make yourselves fat with the chiefest of all the offerings of Israel my people?

30 Wherefore the LORD God of Israel saith, I said indeed that thy house, and the house of thy father, should walk before me for ever: but now the LORD saith, Be it far from me; for them that honour me I will honour, and they that despise me shall be lightly esteemed.

INTRODUCTION: 
Parents have the duty to raise their children in love. God expects parents to bring up children who will love Him, live for Him and make positive impacts I’m the world. Deut. 6:5-7. While there are different styles of parenting in the world, believers should note that successful parenting is achievable.

LESSON OUTLINES

  1. Different parenting styles
  2. God’s style of parenting

DIFFERENT PARENTING STYLES

PARENTING LOVE DISCIPLINE 
STYLES

1. Permissive High Fearful

2. Uninvolved Low Low

3. Authoritarian Low High

4. Influential High High

FELLOWSHIP

1. Permissive Fearful

2. Uninvolved Forsaken

3. Authoritarian. Fighting

4. Influential Friendly

The Permissive Parents:

This types of parents may give verbal comments to their children, but will take little or no action to correct them when they misbehave. Such parents usually equate discipline with meanness. They give in to most of the desires of their children. Eli, the priest, and Samson’s parents are biblical examples of permissive parents. (1 Sam. 2:12-17: 29-30; Judges 13:1-2; 14:1-3).

The Uninvolved Parents:

Such parents are self-oriented and they neglect their responsibilities. They have little or no time to attend to their children but rather pursue other concerns of life like career, business, ministry, pleasure etc. They show little or no concern for well-being of their children and hardly communicate with them. King David and Samuels were examples. (1King 1:5-6; 2Sam. 2:14:28; 1Sam. 8:1-5)

The Authoritarianism Parents

They run home with authority (iron fist) Children in such home have no voice or input whatsoever. That are “to be seen and not to be heard”. An authoritarian parent will use anger and harsh discipline to keep control. This behaviour may frustrate or causes child to lose heart and lack self-esteem. (Col. 3:21)
King Saul was an example. (1 Sam. 20:30).

The Influential Parents

The parents combine love and discipline without compromising either. They have clear boundaries but also very loving.

Children brought up in such homes are usually happy capable and successful. Mordecai, the adoptive parent of Esther. (Esther 2:1-10), Timothy’s mother and grandmother (2Tim.1:5-7; 3:14-15) are examples of influential parents in the bible.

GOD’S STYLE OF PARENTING

God, as the father of all, has clearly shown us the example of how to successfully raise our children. We need to follow in His footsteps. The Father loves and wants us to be involved with His children (Jer. 31:3; John 15:15; 16:27). He communicates clear instructions for us to follow(Pro. 4:3-4).
He forgives and show mercy when we fail(Heb. 8:12). He disciplines and corrects us when we disobey and rebel against Him(Pro. 3:12; Heb.12:7).
The Father models the truth (John 13:15) He encourages and comforts us. (1Thess. 2:11-12). He protects us from harm. (Heb. 11:23). He provides for His children. (Ps. 78: 23-25; 2Cor. 12:14).

CONCLUSION
Parents need to be careful not to either be extremely legalistic or 
permissive. God’s pattern of parenting is balanced by His love, affirmation and grace.